I feel like a blender.


Suddenly, I'm filled with tens of hundreds of different feelings and questions and doubts.
And I don't even know why I am like this today.


I just read a friend's blog, and usually when I see her she's bubbly and happy, always smiling.
But then, her entries are so heartbreaking, and I can't imagine that someone could be so good at masking everything she feels from the world.


I wish I could do that sometimes.
It would be so easy - to live behind a shield, a disguise.
It would be so much easier - not to have to explain every damn feeling.


But then again, bottling everything up inside would just eat you up slowly.
Degenerate your insides and emotions until you're left with just the shell of your former self.


And I know I'm just ranting and talking rubbish.
There's a million things running through my mind, and it's as though I'm just typing it all out here just to clear some space.
So bear with me, will you?
Ha ha.


*
p/s: you might see me with unwashed hair tomorrow. gross, but I can't help it! i love the just-after-haircut feeling.

so sorry i couldn't make it for your surprise birthday party.
thanks for being a great friend, kay.
you really are the sweetest person i know.
*hug*
hope you get everything you wish for!

Labels: Ivy